In a shocking turn of events, Watermelon and Ketchup have emerged as frontrunners in the 2024 presidential election. Their platforms? Pool parties and backyard barbecues vs. protecting America’s right to dip, dollop, and drizzle.
As they court the coveted black vote, Watermelon touts its African roots, while Ketchup promises economic empowerment through condiment industry jobs.
But what do black voters really want? Do they prioritize community, tradition, and heritage, or progress, innovation, and flavor?
Watermelon’s Campaign Promises:
– Free watermelon slices at every polling station
– Mandatory backyard barbecue etiquette classes
– Citrulline subsidies for small businesses
Ketchup’s Platform:
– Free ketchup dispensers in every public space
– Condiment industry job training programs
– “Dip, Dollop, and Drizzle” national holidays
Will Watermelon’s sweet charm or Ketchup’s tangy zip win over black voters? Only time will tell.
The Ultimate Question: Would Kamala Harris or Donald Trump dare to dip their watermelon slices in ketchup?
Stay tuned for more updates on this saucy saga! November 6 will be an interesting day, and we might just need some popcorn to enjoy the play!
Mr Ge
